Pride, Rejuvenated!

Last weekend, The Jason Show packed up the trucks and crew (AKA the mini-van, AKA the Homobile, AKA the Grocery Getter) and headed up to San Francisco to bring Amelia some of her furniture and stuff, since she has forsaken dorm life got her own bad self out onto the city streets to find her first apartment.  Here she is standing on her street.

She has two roommates that are as cute as pie, and they all seem to be a good match.  They have a three bedroom apartment so they each have their own room.  When I was 18 I would have sold my body on the street to have my own room instead of sharing with my annoying athlete's foot spray smelling roommates.

After unloading the van, we decided to take the train on over to the Castro district to check out the gigantic street party going on there.  We basically wandered around in quiet amazement at the assortment of people beginning their pride celebration.  The crowd was loud, joyous, crazy, and dancing up a storm.  Some wore regular clothes, others wore elaborate and outlandish outfits, some wore hardly anything at all, and yes, a few wore nothing at all.  Seriously!  Apparently, San Francisco police looks the other when when it comes to public nudity.  Ahem.  In the photo above, Amelia and I are standing in front of a giant rainbow flag and a pink triangle up on the hill.  Look closely.  See?

The main thing that I felt during this evening street party was beige.  I felt so beige.  So boring.  So schoolteacherish.  But I'm okay with that!


The next morning we met our two new friends, Ayme and Mike, at the Pride Parade.   

The parade consisted of the usual Dykes on Bikes,

the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence, 

various gay friendly and gay oriented organizations and businesses, as well as marching bands, cheer leading squads, and floats--all super gay!  The grand marshalls of the parades were Olympia Dukakis 

and Chaz Bono. 

After the parade, we wandered over to the Civic Center, which was the center of the celebration.  City Hall was surrounded by several different DJs playing a wide variety of dance music, as well as hundreds of street vendors and food stands and places to buy drinks, including beer and margaritas.  It was packed.

We danced for a while on the Latin stage and then made our way to the DJ that was playing lots of Lady Gaga, among other dance grooves.  This was where we had the most fun!  This is where we experienced one of those moments when the music takes hold, the spirit of the crowd is contagious, and you just feel it.

I think I like this photograph of me more than any other I've ever been in.  Can't you just tell how much fun I was having?

Amelia even felt it.  Of course, she was dancing with Rossana, and you'd have to be a zombie not to feel the gusto and love of life that Rossana eminates. (Rossana was my brother-in-law's girlfriend for a few years, at which point she became family.  Even though the two of them parted ways, we still regard her as family.  I distinctly remember telling her at one point after I'd known her for about a year that she was our new best friend and always would be even if she and Giampiero didn't work out.  Shortly after she and Giampiero broke up, she moved back home to San Francisco.  And since Amelia moved up there, Rossana has been a godsend.  It was so much easier for me to let my 17 year old daughter live up there on her own knowing she would be watched over.   She's helped her out on so many different occasions, including a couple of illnesses, moving, and even the great tsunami scare of 2011!  Clearly I need to dedicate a whole other post to this amazing friend.)

Moving on...the eye candy was prevalent!  I could have filled my entire memory card with eye candy photos.  But I did exercise a certain degree of self-control.

Whew!

The party continued on into Monday.  Ayme (above, in green dress) invited us to have dinner on her yacht.

What fun!  And what an unlikely combination of characters we were:

1-2nd grade teacher (me)

1-political science/prelaw major (Amelia)

1-beautiful transgendered yacht owner with the most generous heart you'll ever find (Ayme)

1-gay/straight/bi (?) mover, as in furniture mover, who rents space on the yacht from Ayme (Mike)

1-Rossana, as I've explained above

1-British character also named Jason who works in the music industry and managed to push all of Amelia's buttons to engage her in hot political debate, and loved to talk about tits

We also took the time to pose with duck lips. (This one is especially for you, Vinyl.)

And we took the time to just pose.

The next morning, I got to meet Amelia's boyfriend, Chris.  Amelia has always had good taste in guys.    Chris, of course, is the best so far.
They are both artistic and musical.  They do collaborative art projects just for fun, and they make their own music, just for fun.

I had a fabulous time on this little trip of mine.   Even so, I was so ready to get back to my L.A. summer!

"The coldest winter I ever spent was a summer in San Francisco."
(Snopes.com declares that Mark Twain did not actually say this, but I would like to go on believing that he did.)

Remember a Change of Scenery!

This was an episode of The Jason Show that was never aired, until now.  As a writer, once in a while I will pound something out and then think twice about posting it.

"You can always tell that you need a change of scenery when everyone and everything around you begins irritating you.    When little things that ordinarily don’t bother you, drive you nucking futs.  When you walk around all day with an inner dialogue that does nothing but bitch, moan, and curse. When you have very little patience.  When you want to move away and live by yourself.  When you want to get a cubicle job where you don’t have to talk to anyone the whole entire day.  When you just can’t stand the thought of being responsible for anyone else’s behavior for another second.  When all the clutter on the countertops makes you turn red in the face.  When the sight of a cigarette butt or the scent of an ash tray makes you feel homicidal.  When a can of Coke spilled on the couch makes you want to gouge out your eyes with a fork.  When a car parked behind yours makes it impossible to get out to get to work on time.  When work issues seem petty and annoying.  When you feel like your tolerance for those of differing opinions on major issues has now at this moment just expired.  When you don’t want to get up in the morning because it is…another day.  When the fact that you have even just one more thing on the calendar makes you grind your teeth down to stubs.  When you want to withdraw into yourself and focus only on your own thoughts…or the lack thereof.  When you feel like you work your a$$ off and come home and those who don’t work haven’t managed to even accomplish the simplest of tasks, leaving them for you.  When even the perception of laziness makes you want to throw things and scream uncontrollably.  When the lunch that you packed yourself makes you want to cry.  When you feel like a cranky malcontent.  That’s when you know you need a change of scenery."

I'm happy to report that I took my own advice and went away, just for three days, and now I'm back home, refreshed, rejuvinated, and feeling more myself again.

Stay tuned for details.

A San Francisco Pride Teaser

This may or may not have been taken as I shook my booty in a crowd of strangers this weekend at San Francisco Gay Pride yesterday.

Stay tuned!

My Funny FIL

Every once in a while my little Italian father-in-law gives me a good chuckle, especially with his plays on words.

To the server at a restaurant:

FIL:  I'll have the baked potato.

Server:  Would you like sour cream on that?

FIL:  Why would I want something sour?  I get enough sour with my wife!

Although, with his accent, his plays on words are lost to your average American.  But not me.  I catch them every time.

At the end of mass:

Priest:  Go in peace.

FIL:  (Leaning over to me as we file out.)  Did you hear the priest?  He said, "Go and piss."  That is exactly what I will do.

A Jason Show Family Wedding: The Inside Scoop

Now for the post that you've all a couple of you have been waiting for. . . the down low about what really happened at this wedding.  I suppose every wedding has an inside story.  Here's this one's.

In no particular order, let me highlight some of the highlights:

Kilts were worn by the male members of the bride's family, and they're not even Scottish.  Just kidding, they really are.  The most loyal of viewers and any family member can tell you that out of all of the people in the family likely to lift up a kilt to see if there's any underwear beneath, it would be Tia Ely.

Just look at her!  That face says "I'm a kilt lifter-upper if there ever was one."  So, yes, during the reception, she lifted up a certain kilt and a few in the general area saw that, indeed, Scottish men do not wear underwear  under their kilts.  However, I was not one of them.  I did, in typical fashion, look up just in time to see Tia Ely lift up her skirt.  And, you guessed it, she wasn't wearing any underwear.  Gotcha!  She was.  But I didn't want to see it.  I wonder if our Scottish friend did?

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While it was a gorgeous wedding, and everything was nearly perfect, the minister kept calling the bride by the wrong name.  Is that bad?  I kind of think it is.  He kept saying "Daniela" instead of Donella.

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After the ceremony, as the best man and the bride's maid walked out, the best man held onto the bride's maid's arm instead of vice versa.  This best man may or may not have been my husband.

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This wedding was a splendid mix of Mexicans, Italians, Scots, Canadians, and Americans.  Our family is like the great melting pot, although the politically correct term these days is to the great mixed green salad.  In any case, I love the diversity!

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One of the guests, who shall remain nameless, gave me a chubby highly entertained me with tales of her current, much younger boyfriend.  She's in her mid forties.  He's in his mid twenties.  Do the math.  She deserves some fun!  At one point she had me nearly drooling rolling on the floor.

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This little boy can dance!  He is Diego's cousin, six years old, and a natural.  If only you could have seen him tearing up the dance floor.  I loved it so much.

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Of course, any wedding where alcohol is served is bound to have a few booze related events.  You know, the inappropriate funny slow dancing between two unlikely females in attendance, the sloppy funny kiss on the mouth between one of the bride's or groom's parents and someone else on the other side of the family, or the eyebrow raising funny comment about how hot another guest is when she says "Hi."

The girls in this photo were not actually at the wedding.  I just Googled "drunk face" and this is the best of what popped up.  Oh, and by the way, don't ever let your children Google "drunk girl."  Whoa Nelly!

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Here is an exchange I had with a sloshed female wedding guest regarding male wedding guest, whose name is Jaime (prounced HI-MAY in Spanish).

Guest:  Whuss that guy'z name agin?

Me:  Jaime.

Guest:  Huh?  Hi---huh?

Me: Jaime.  Jai.  Me.


Guest:  Whu the fook kinda name is that?

Me:  It's Spanish for Jamie or James.  It's prounced like "Hi" (I waved my hand) and May, like the month of me.  Hi-may.  Hi-may.  Himay.

Guest:  (The lightbulb pops on.) Ohhhhhh, you mean like Hi, MAYIPINCHYOURASS?

Me:  (Peeing my pants).  Yes!  That's exactly it!

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And now, it appears that I have said quite enough.  If The Jason Show is suddenly canceled without warning, you'll know why.

A Jason Show Family Wedding: Part 3

Last week, Jason's brother-in-law, Giampiero, and his fiance, Donella, who are two recurring guest stars on The Jason Show, got married.  In this miniseries, enjoy a recap of the couple's nuptials.

The Ceremony and Festivities

A Jason Show Family Wedding, Part 2

Last week, Jason's brother-in-law, Giampiero, and his fiance, Donella, who are two recurring guest stars on The Jason Show, got married.  In this miniseries, enjoy a recap of the couple's nuptials.

The Guests