It is no huge secret that I would happily be a nudist if I could. I love being naked. Sometimes clothes are just too constricting. I've been to a nude beach once and I've been to a nude resort once. If you speak to a traditional nudist they will tell you that it really has nothing to do with sex, and in most instances I would agree.
Of course, there are many settings in which nudity is always unacceptable, most especially when it makes others uncomfortable.
One such occasion is when you are staying at your in-law's house and you walk into the living room only to see your father-in-law playing the piano, completely naked. (This happened to a close relative of mine who shall not be named but he/she will know who he/she is when he/she reads this! Wait. That sounded like my close relative is a he-she. No, not a he-she, my relative might be a he or might be a she, I'm just not being clear on this in order to further protect her/his anonymity.)
Another time that nudity is not appreciated is in a public restroom. Once while we were on a cruise, I was in one of the public restrooms near a dining area and the waters were a little choppy. While walking into the restroom, I had to put my hand against a stall door to steady myself. The gentleman inside the stall had forgotten to close the latch, so the door flew open, and there he was, sitting there, wearing nothing but tennis shoes! (When Diego was younger he would insist on taking all of his clothes off in order to sit on the throne. This man never outgrew that phase, I suppose.) Imagine his surprise when the door burst open!
Nudity is also disturbing when it involves the homeless or the mentally ill, which I guess really goes without saying. While I lived in South America, there was a tall, thin homeless/mentally ill woman that just skipped around town completely naked, every day. Nobody ever did anything about this situation, and everyone in town just her "la desnudita" (the naked lady). She scared me a bit because if you walked past her, she would snarl and twist her nipples, even if you were trying not to look.
So...hey! It is now your turn to share your favorite naked story. I know you've got one, so don't be selfish! Dish it up!
So...hey! It is now your turn to share your favorite naked story. I know you've got one, so don't be selfish! Dish it up!
38 comments:
I do have a favorite naked story! And it also involves a cruise.
We were on a cruise and our next-door neighbors were a passel of frat-boys having a bachelor party. Debauchery was involved, as you might expect.
My then 12-year old daughter and I returned to our cabin one evening and there was a naked partier passed out on our doorstep.
I knocked on their door and informed his friends that while I had been pretty accepting of their wild ways I was drawing the line at them exposing themselves to my young daughter. They dragged him inside.
When I was a newly-minted nurse I took a job at the summer camp where I used to go as a child. (I still work there every summer) That year I was the same age as the councillors so I hung out with them and was invited on their midnight trips to the lake for skinny dipping. I miss those summers! Night swimming with no clothes on just feels so great. I am MUCH older than the staff now so I can't do it anymore. Sigh.
Oh, and for the record, the staff I went swimming with were resource and programming councillors, not the ones assigned to cabins to be with the kids. No children were left unsupervised because of our swims.
When it is just hubby and me and the kids have been long asleep I still like to use our hot tub topless. (and not just to make hubby twitchy...it just feels so good!)
I am SO laughing at the vision of the lady twisting her nipples and running through town.
I have a few naked stories, but they all involved me being flashed by random men while I was a teenager. I am still trying to get past it.
I wish I had a good naked story to share. I can't think of anything good at all. I have never really loved being naked at all. Darn it.
I wish I was comfortable enough in my own skin to enjoy being naked. It would probably make my husband happy too:)
Being naked isn't a big deal to me. I used to hang around with a group of friends, and we'd have "naked parties". Just party like normal, only naked. Of course, we were usually tripping on acid, but still. It was actually fun as hell! And not a big orgy, either.
Plus, I'm glad I did it when I was young with the kick ass body. :)
I don't have any cool naked stories, but I suspect my next door neighbors do (There are lots and lots of windows at our house, and I don't always remember to grab a towel before showering).
Obviously I just blogged about my recent nude adventures. But one of my favorite memories is skinny dipping at my friend Cheryl's house on a hot summer night. What a way to beat the heat!
Hubby and I used to frequent a nude beach when we lived in B.C. (British Columbia). It was a little intimidating at first but once you got the 'hang' of it, it was great!
Too self conscious to have a tantalizing nude stories of my own but enjoy reading these.
I'm far to self-conscious about my dimpled arse to be flashing it around town...
I love being naked outdoors! One of the main reasons we bought our house was that it was impossible for the neighbors to see into our backyard. I sometimes garden naked, although I'm careful to avoid the roses.
Some great stories here. I have several, but here is one. One nice summer morning I had gotten up and opened the sliding door in bedroom and then headed to the shower. I forgot about the alarm. Police came, saw open door and came in. I walked into bedroom, naked, and the policemen (2 of them) pulled their guns and made me freeze (I'm still naked). They proceeded to question me for about 10 minutes, trying to make sure I'm not some rapist. I am still naked. The cute policemen finally let me get my ID and then laugh about the whole thing and let me put some shorts on.
Once, when I lived in Germany, I was walking through a park after dark. I had been drinking and was headed back to my room when a man jumped out of the bushes and flashed my friend and I. We laughed so hard he started to cry......I guess he wasn't endowed enough for the job and ran away!!!!!
Like you, I too love to be naked. One night after work, I was walking around cleaning up while in my birthday suit. When I took the garbage downstairs, the garage door opened, and there plain as day I was standing stark naked with my friend and his wife who "just dropped by"! It felt uncomfortable until she told my Hubby how "impressed" she was! To this day my friend refers to my package as "luggage". LOL......I think they are just being kind...
I can't beat the nipple twisting story.
When I was an intern, I once walked into my resident's office and caught he and his gf fucking standing up against a wall. I would have gotten away with it, except that I was carrying a tray with my lunch on it and somehow tripped over my own feet and went flying out into the hall with the sandwich and milk flying.
Neither he nor I ever said a word about it. Ever. But, yeah...every single time I looked at him after that I pictured him bucking her against the wall and muttering, "Take it, baby, take it."
Hmm.. Well, the only one that comes to mind is when I was 13. "Streaking" was very popular during this time. I went to an all girls Catholic school in So. Cal. Leaving school one day a man ran through our parking lot, totally naked. I hadn't ever seen a naked man before! It was, how shall we say, an eye opener!! Took me a little while to erase that vision from my memory. Oh Great! Now it's back again... Thanks alot Jason! tee hee hee -
Cheers, Cindy
I grew up on Long Island, New York near the beach. Back in the 70's, if you went to Robert Moses to the last parking area to the east, then walked further east for a while there was a beach that some people used as a nude beach. In high school this was amusing to us although MOST of the people there really should have covered up. Seriously. ::shudder::
One day we saw this young teenage guy take off his bathing suit and within seconds he was sporting a rather impressive woody! I guess he was excited about the fresh air and all that. He quickly ran behind the dunes to put his suit back on. It was pretty amusing at the time.
Sorry, no stories to share. I am no exhibitionist. Much too busy being a Voyeur. So if you have any pictures to share…, you know my email address.
Your Friend, m.
Who is typing fully clothed by the way.
I'm with you. I like being naked. I don't really care if people see me or not. I have no shame.
I thought this post had a lot more naked in it, but the naked just creeps in at the end:
http://redstapler23.blogspot.com/2009/10/ojai-day-for-those-who-dont-want-whole.html
Well, I absolutely do not have a naked story as good as yours, which was quite amazing.
However, I did streak with a group of guys through our high school on the second to last day of school of my senior year. We had socks on our dongs, but it was close enough. They threatened to stop us from graduating, but they caved, of course.
I wouldn't mind living in a nudist camp as long as there was an age limit of say... 50.
Although, I say that and there is that Seinfeld episode that his girlfriend is always walking around naked and he thought he would love it but ended up hating it...
yeah, I could see that happening too.
My hubby still enjoys throne time in the nude. I don't really get it myself. But, I don't mind. It's when he leaves the door open that it gets a little oogy.
I do have a favorite naked story. Wondering if I'll get around to posting the whole story or if I should write the abridged version in your comments.
That's one of the things I most miss about living alone. That, and never shutting the bathroom door.
1. The very first time that my husband took the kids to his parents so I could get ready for a night out with my friends... they left the house and the first thing I did was strip down and walk around naked. All over my house. Simply because I could.
2. My first marriage ended just shy of 3 years. I moved out of our apartment when we separated and moved in with a theatre friend. She was a 50-something woman, single (recenlty divorced) who owned a small home with a spare room and she offered me that room until I could get on my feet. She was a lawyer and very comfortable. One day, I came home from work and was surprised to find her car in the garage. I walked in and called a loud hello... no answer. But I heard talking and laughing. I went and changed out of my work clothes and started looking for the source of the voices. My friend was in the hot tub with a gentleman friend who was well known in our theatre group. Both were naked, broad daylight, in the hot tub on the back deck with very little privacy fencing around it. Best of all, this guy- in his late 60's- was squatting in the hot tub and front facing me when I came walking out. They invited me to grab a glass of wine and join them but.... yeah... I suddenly had a list of plans to attend to away from home!!
Apparently, I judged it post-worthy.
i have never been a fan of naked, but i think that had a lot to do with my upbringing and then later my kids. i didn't really enjoy sleeping naked before kids, because i got cold easily and after kids there was always one or two coming in the room in the middle of the night. now that my kids are older and not always at my house i have been known to walk around naked some. usually on my way to the shower or after my shower for a few minutes. but believe me the fact that i walk out of the bathroom naked is a huge amount of progress for me!
The boys loved to run nekkid in the house after their baths when they were toddlers. Oooh, good times. They did the undressed potty thing too like Diego, gee MEN!!!
I was once in New Orleans and a man stripped his clothes off and shit right on the sidewalk. I was in highschool on a field trip.
Two summers ago we spent a month at the beach. A french man was staying a few houses down from us. We often would see him on the beach and assumed he had on a speedo. He had dunlap, meaning his belly dunlapped over his goods or so we thought. One day the float I used got away from me and he went out to the water to get it. As he got closer my 11 year old daughter at the time said "Mom that man has no clothes on!" Sure enough he didn't. He also stole my float! We saw him two other times strolling down the beach, bare ass and all. Did I mention I live in Alabama, so this is definitely not kosher here.
No naked stories of my own, but I do have a friend who has more than a few stories from when she and her husband were dating and newlyweds that begin with, "So, we were naked, and..."
My own nudity story is fairly droll...walking down a street in NYC doing some touristy shopping. A man in a suit coat, cowboy boots and nothing else wanders out of a side street and staggers around for a moment. He then wanders into a nearby shop before being chased out a moment later by a screaming shop owner.
My wife's nudity story was while taking a cross country train trip and riding coach. Sometime during the night, she went to the bathroom and finding it unlocked, opened the door...to find a woman inside, naked except for a transparent rain slicker...rubbing baby oil over herself.
While growing up the family of a friend-of-a-friend used to frequent nudist beaches. Now that I recall, the friend was actually voted Junior Nudist of...probably 1981. It was during 6th grade IIRC.
Being a friend-of-a-friend I only occasionally went to his house but the handful of times that I did he would call out to alert his parents that we were coming in. Despite this I still saw his naked Mum cleaning their swimming pool. While it was probably rude to stare, at least she distracted me from his Dad who was weeding the garden. Yep, in the buff.
Ha...I would scare people when naked. I don't do naked. At least not around other people. Heck, I can't even do the locker room at a gym. Which is why I don't belong to a gym. Which is why I look so scary naked. Yep, it's a vicious cycle. Heh.
Have I mentioned recently how much I LOVE your blog?! LOL...
I too, love being naked. However, my conservative life (insurance nerd, mother of 2 teenagers) prevents me from being nude except when I'm in the shower or when I'm sleeping next to Hubster. (But then I REVEL in it, gosh darn it.)
HOWEVER, here is my favorite nude story... (ahem!) Years ago, when Hubster and I were newlyweds (and incidentally, when we used to go skinny dipping), we lived next door to a VERY corpulent, VERY curmudgeonly and VERY disgusting man (we'll just call him.... RALPH). Well, Ralph would walk his Very Fat Ass from his sliding glass door (which directly faced OUR sliding glass door) to his hot tub on an almost every day basis, in the evening. And he wouldn't hurry. OH NO. This was a slow saunter, jiggle and shake, jiggle and shake.
Now, had Ralph been a HOT 25 year old I probably wouldn't have minded it AT ALL... but Ralph was a VERY icky (as I've mentioned) older man who didn't take care of himself at all and had a MOST unpleasant personality. (Also, he had more hair growing out of his nose and his ears than growing on his head...)
We sold that house and moved away from that area 10 years ago but we STILL talk about Ralph. ICK. (The stuff of nightmares...)
You know just the other day I was working over getting some work done on the house I hope to move into very soon, when one of my neighbours came over and said that my other neighbours - whose deck I have a complete, unobstructed and unavoidable view of from my large kichen windows - like to sunbathe naked on that deck.
I couldn't tell if he was kidding or not.
The curiosity! It burns!
Oh man, I don't have any naked stories half as good as yours!
Oh my god that was hilarious!
I don't have any naked stories... Maybe that is why I go through life wondering what everyone would look like naked.
I'm here because Martha sent me.
I'm thinking that Naked Yoga is much better in theory than in reality.
But I don't know for sure. Don't really need to know for sure.
This is hilarious. (I love the voice in your writing, BTW.) I really admire the way Mr.4444 can just walk around, butt-naked (yes, I know it's "buck-naked," but I like butt-naked, too) without a care in the world for what anyone is thinking. Me, not so much.
omg--Naked Yoga? EWWWW
My son then 4 and a half running outside buck naked to say goodbye to the realtor. What is more amusing is that I yelled out "That means he LIKES you!" like it all made perfect sense. One perplexed look later she pealed off.
Lying to get a job as a homecare aid while in University. My FIRST job, the day of my interview I go to an elderly woman who is spread eagle on her bed having her catheter changed. I nearly passed out. (Years later it was I inserting the catheter!)
Post a Comment