The doctor was pooping in the stall next to us. All of the telltale noises reverberated throughout the restroom, and loud public toilet flushes joined in perfect public harmony, the kind that you only seem to experience in airport bathrooms after long flights. I cringed and rolled my eyes.
"...yes, yes, we ordered the CT scan and there was no obstruction, that is what I am telling you..."
The doctor was pooping in the stall next to us and taking an important phone call, in an authoritative, slightly irritated doctor sort of way. He spoke in a thick accent, one I could not quite identify.
As I urged Diego to finish his own business through gritted teeth, I wondered. "What does the person on the other end of this call think about all of this grunting and flatulence and flushing? Is this person a nurse who experiences this sort of thing from typically eccentric and egocentric physician, or is this person a loved one of a patient, or a patient himself? Are they just grateful that he took the call after being unavailable during his flight?"
"...no, she will not need that type of medication...no, we will wait for the test results....and I...no...no....absolutely not." FLUSH!!! he flushed.
FLUSH!!! we flushed. And all three of us walked out of our stalls at the same time. I can never make eye contact in these situations, although if I haven't seen the person's face, sometimes I secretly scan shoes in the restroom to find the culprit next to me. I feel so disgusting while I do it, but I can't help myself. I'm observant.
Again, I muse. Why did he have to answer right at that moment? Are doctors required to answer all phone calls, even when they're indisposed, having a bowel movement in a public restroom? Or did he just choose to answer because he is very conscientious, or maybe he had a patient that he was particularly worried about?
Or was he simply one of those people with no sense of public restroom etiquette at all?.