Jason's Adventures in Used Car Shopping

I've spent the last few days looking at used cars for Hilary and Nathan. This proved to be a very interesting experience, as I used Craigslist to guide me along the way. The people you can meet driving all over Southern California looking for that perfect car can be quite entertaining!
I spoke with and met several individuals, getting glimpses into their lives, often leaving me wanting to know more about them, my curiousity piqued. But the two individuals that I really wanted to share with you were these:

First I met an actor living in a Beverly Hills apartment who was selling a Ford Escort. Maybe you'll recgonize him, his name is Barry Ratcliffe. Click the link to see his latest work.

He was a totally nice guy, and I would have bought the car from him except that it had more miles on it than I really wanted. He was so nice, in fact, that he let Diego use his potty twice, once for #1, then later for #2! While Giancarlo was helping Diego in the bathroom, Barry gave me a bottle of water and then motioned for me to come and look through a doorway that was just off the kitchen. He pointed at a woman sleeping in a poofy white bed, dead to the world, and laughed at her saying how she's been working very hard and was completely knocked out. I felt that I was looking at something very inappropriate! I mean, I know that if my significant other brought some stranger who was shopping for economy cars to the doorway of my bedroom while I was sleeping and laughed at me, I would be furious! Sleeping is very private! Secondly, how did she not wake up? Not only were we gazing into the room while Barry laughingly spoke of her exhaustion, but Diego was talking in his normal unabashed voice about going pee-pee!

Next I met a young construction worker in the hills of Glendale named Austin who was selling a Kia Spectra that he bought from the police impound yard. He was wearing a tank top, and he was pretty good looking, except that he had the bushiest armpits in America. These weren't just hairy, they were out. Of. Control. I kid you not! The hair poofed out like sprays of seaweed waving in the water, calling all attention away from his chiseled cheek bones, perfect nose, and piercing eyes. I was struggling not to stare, thinking vaguely about the manscaping that needed to be done. While we were looking at the car, his mother came out to the street, dragging heavily on a cigarette, and reminded him to buy water and lettuce when he was done with me. I'm certain she was one of the Barbi twins.

As she commented on what a great car the Kia was, Austin took the cigarette out of his mother's mouth, put it to his, and pulled smoke deep into this lungs. Once again, I felt like I was witnessing something that I shouldn't, as if sharing a cigarette with your Barbi twin mother was somehow bordering on the incestuous. In any case, I didn't feel comfortable with the car and I moved on.

We ended up buying a Daewoo station wagon from a rental place in Downey. Yes, Downey, home of the late, great Karen Carpenter. Perhaps it was because this was the best deal. Perhaps it was due to the low miles on the car. Maybe it was due to the practicality of the car. Or, maybe it was because this was a place of business, something I am accustomed to, and there was no chance I would be shown things that maybe I shouldn't be shown.